it's the climb

so i never thought i'd admit to listening to a teenybopper's music :-) but this song sung by miley cyrus (simply titled "the climb") is really getting to me. here are the lyrics:

i can almost see it
that dream I'm dreaming but
there's a voice inside my head sayin,
you'll never reach it,
every step I'm taking,
every move I make feels
lost with no direction
my faith is shaking but I
got to keep trying
got to keep my head held high

there's always going to be another mountain
i'm always gonna wanna make it move
always going to be an uphill battle,
sometimes I'm gonna have to lose,
ain't about how fast I get there,
ain't about what's waiting on the other side
it's the climb

the struggles I'm facing,
the chances I'm taking
sometimes might knock me down but
no I'm not breaking
i may not know it
but these are the moments that
i'm going to remember most yeah
just got to keep going
and I,
i got to be strong
just keep pushing on, cause

there's always going to be another mountain
i'm always gonna wanna make it move
always gonna be an uphill battle,
sometimes I'm gonna have to lose,
ain't about how fast I get there,
ain't about what's waiting on the other side
it's the climb

indeed, it's all about the climb. what's yours?

p/s to listen to this, go to youtube and search for "the climb miley".

carpe diem quam minimum credula postero

"seize the day and place no trust in tomorrow", so says this latin quote made famous by many including robin williams in the well-known silver screen drama "dead poets society". this theme seems to be prevalent in many different forms, emphasising different aspects of the concept. in one of her earlier albunms, sheila majid has a song entitled "tua sebelum waktunya", which describes the stereotypical man who spends his days in the office and nights at clubs, but knows little else. he is woefully short on life experiences and exposure to the many wonders in the world. regardless of the many variations on the theme, the key message of these cries seem to be against mediocrity and conformism.

as i look back on my own life, i realize that i've done what countless many others have done before and beside me. i've gone to school, chosen a safe course of study, come out immediately into a job in the corporate world, found my soulmate (my greatest blessing), gotten married, bought a house, had kids (my greatest blessings too!), started working towards educating them and planning for retirement.

as many around me were and still are, i was a lemming. you know .. lemmings .. the expression used to describe androids, suits, cookie cutter peopple, who are no different from one another, who mindlessly follow the herd, who live in mediocrity, whose ideas of excitement are in the league of choosing a slightly different color of shirt to buy.

WHY??!!! surely, surely, SURELY!!!! there is so much more to life than this!!!

for the strangest reason, the vast majority of the human race seems content (as i was) to live a life where we errect boundaries around our lives, set parameters around "acceptable behaviour", and look to conform to the "done thing". why, oh why is it that we think it always better to choose the "safe" course of action? why, oh WHY, do we think it more enriching to choose the well-trodden way? are not the "unsafe" and "out of the box" decisions that we make the more memorable and soul-enriching ones?

as examples, when we paint a house, do we remember the white or light beige walls that seem to be found everywhere? or do we hold excitedly in our memories our choices to splash bold colors on our "signature walls"?? do we remember better the protons or toyotas that we choose safely drive, or do we remember that crazy, irrational choice of that temperamental italian dream sports car (albeit used and not in all that great a condition!) that we lived with for a short time, even if it fell apart eventually?

so, when we choose how we spend our limited resources, and most importantly, our TIME (which is fleeting!), why would we not choose the path less taken, the avenue less safe, but the experience more memorable? why would we not choose the less normal and the more EXCITING and ADVENTUROUS?? surely we owe it to ourselves to build not tame and drab, colorless lives, but JAGGED and COLORFUL and BOLD lives and memories. with these choices may come not just vivid memories, but also difficulties and challenges and pain. but it is such experiences that tell us that we have LIVED!

i surely thank some friends around me who have unconsciously or otherwise taught me a new philosophy to life ... to live life to the fullest, to say YES to the unsafe, to choose the different path, and to SEIZE THE DAY! you know who you are. :-)

now, if you ever see me going back to being a lemming, slap me.

it's six months today

exactly 6 months ago from today, at about 10am on september 5, 2008, my best friend, my wife, my lover, and the mother of my children, went home to be with the Lord. fiona, i love you and miss you terribly. and i can't wait to see you again when we are reunited in God's presence.

we went sailing!

our God is good and full of blessings! just yesterday, i had a chance to fulfil a dream ... be on a real life sailboat .. you know ... one of those with real sails, where you move because you're carried along on the wind, not one of those big comfortable yachts where you're sipping iced tea or champagne while a diesel engine putters you along. no, a real sail boat, where you have to raise the sails, pull the lines, keep things in trim just to keep moving, and you stop moving or get pushed sideways by the current if you're not.

thanks to max and vanessa, and van's kind cousin ai li at the royal selangor yacht club in port klang, we had a chance to join the club members in a couple of friendly races. we were put on board the unity, a 41-footer cabin cruiser skippered by a kind aussie gentleman by the name of ken. it wasn't an america's cup racing yacht by any means, but it had big sails and lines and winches and it was a sailboat!


after a few lessons on how to work the lines and winches, we went out with the diesel engine to the harbor where there was space for the races. Soon enough, the engine got switched off, the sails went up, and we were sailing!

thanks to glenn, a professional skipper (who sails/transports boats around the world for boat owners), and max (who has some 30 years of competitive sailing experience), we were soon going fast, cutting through the harbor waters, tilting over at 30 degree angles as the wind caught hold of our sails. it was the real thing, real sailing, and it was absolutely thrilling.

after much heaving on ropes and winding of winches, and executing manouvers like tacking and gybing, we were rewarded with some amazing news .... we won! even though it was just the "floaters" (casual) class, it was satisfying nonetheless. some celebration drinks ensued as we arrived back at the yacht club, along with a general agreement that we would all be back on the water again before long.

if you've never tried sailing, here's my recommendation: do it! it's great fun, and there are often lots of boat skippers who are looking for willing crew members to accompany them on casual afternoons on the water or in fun races like the one we were on.

Lord, thanks for a wonderful experience, it was a dream come true!

don't drink and drive

so i don't like to do those emails where you're asked to forward them to as many people as possible because that amounts to chain-lettering and spam, and i didn't forward this one ... but this is a good story that makes one think.

i was walking around in a target store, when i saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back. the boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. the cashier said, 'i'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll.' then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''granny, are you sure i don't have enough money?'' the old lady replied: ''you know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look around. she left quickly. the little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. finally, i walked toward him and i asked him who he wished to give this doll to. 'it's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for christmas. she was sure that santa claus would bring it to her.' i replied to him that maybe santa claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry. but he replied to me sadly. 'no, santa claus can't bring it to her where she is now. i have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there.' his eyes were so sad while saying this. 'my sister has gone to be with God. daddy says that mommy is going to see God very soon too, so i thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'' my heart nearly stopped. the little boy looked up at me and said: 'i told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. i need her to wait until i come back from the mall.' then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. he then told me 'i want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me.' 'i love my mommy and i wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister.' then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. i quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. 'suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?'' 'ok' he said, 'i hope i do have enough.' i added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. there was enough for the doll and even some spare money. the little boy said: 'thank you God for giving me enough money!' then he looked at me and added, 'i asked last night before i went to sleep for God to make sure i had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give it to my sister. he heard me!'' 'i also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but i didn't dare to ask God for too much. but he gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'' 'my mommy loves white roses.' a few minutes later, the old lady returned and i left with my basket. i finished my shopping in a totally different state from when i started. i couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. then i remembered a local news paper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. the little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. the family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. was this the family of the little boy? two days after this encounter with the little boy, i read in the news paper that the young woman had passed away. i couldn't stop myself as i bought a bunch of white roses and i went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial. she was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. i left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed for ever... the love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. and in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.

so 2 things come to mind:
1) if you ever think that one more drink for the road should be fine, it's not!
2) keep your ears, eyes, and heart open for how God might want to use you to bless someone today.

have a great day!